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EXPERIENCE 4/17/13: THE BALLOON TRAUMA
Today I took my grandkids to the park for a picnic, to
play on the playground and then feed the ducks. On the
way, we drove through a drive-thru to pick up a lunch
and they handed us helium balloons with our order. Our
youngest toddler grasped her balloon and cried. I had
no idea what was wrong and the eldest said she was
afraid of losing her balloon.
At the park when I opened the back trunk and bent over
to get our things suddenly all 3 of them were crying
very loud with big tears. When I looked to see what was
wrong, they were all peering up into the sky at 3
balloons! I felt so bad for them and so I took the
chair out of the trunk, sat down and looked into their
eyes at their level. I said that we would stop by the
store and buy some mylar balloons and they could pick
out the ones they wanted. That immediately consoled the
2 older ones, but our youngest simply would not be
consoled. Nothing I said or did helped. She just kept
crying. When I tore open the paper bags and used them
for a plate and put the food on them, She put both of
her hands flat onto her bag and just cried, not eating.
I asked her what was wrong and she said, “Fly away.”
She would eat nothing unless I put my own hand on her
bag to hold it down. So with the other hand I am
getting out the drinks and as I get a drink, she grabs
it and puts it back into the cardboard drink holder.
And then she grabs the food and puts things back into
the sack, and then the condiments. She dumps her own
food in. All the while, she is crying terribly.
I asked her if she wanted to eat, to play, feed the
ducks, call Mommy, call Daddy, go home, take a nap, come
sit in my lap, get another balloon… I kept coming up
with ideas and she said no to all of them and kept
grabbing things as soon as I put them down, and crying
that they would fly away! Nothing I said or did
helped. Finally I asked, “What can Grammy do for you?”
She replied, “Hold me!!!” So I picked her up and she
pulled her own feet up into a ball and hid her face in
my chest and I just rocked her little balled up person.
She immediately quieted down and closed her eyes as I
patted and rocked her.
Later when we left to feed the ducks, I noticed she had
the same wadded up paper in her hand and would not let
it go. It had encumbered her ability to eat and play
and she just would not let it go. Finally when it came
to receiving bread for the ducks, she let it go in place
of the bread.
I really prayed about this because I realized whatever
trauma she was facing happened before the balloons
escaped the car. She was crying and grasping from the
moment the balloons came in from the drive through. She
does have high ceilings at her house and often when I
visit I see balloons at the top of the ceiling. So
balloons to her cause a fear of loss. And the fact the
balloon was lost, the very thing she feared, this caused
her past trauma to surface and compound it with the new
one. I shared this with Wayne when I got home and we
carefully prayed over all the details of our little
granddaughter’s heart.
This whole experience turned into a very big Word for
me, one with 5 parts!
1. DELETE RECORD OF WRONGS
RHEMA 4/15/13 THE
MOSAIC OF YOUR
BROKEN PAST
HEARD: Don’t go back over your past.
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EXCERPT FROM
"Give
Me the Paper" 4/14/13
by Paige Norfleet
"Give Me the Paper..."
As I inquired of the Lord as to what must be done to
break free of the yoke of sadness, He pointed to a piece
of paper that I held tightly in my fist and spoke, "Give
Me the paper, and in exchange I will give you
what you desire."
Before this moment, I had been completely unaware of my
tightly-clenched
fist or the paper that it held. I immediately knew what
was written on it. This list contained a memoir of
disappointments, failures, and pain. In essence, it was
a record of account; a statement of reasons, causes, or
motives. I had held it for safekeeping in
guarding myself from future mistakes, and I wasn't
sure that I was ready to release it to the Savior. What
if I needed it to keep my heart safe? What if I was
about to repeat an awful mistake again?
But again Jesus asked for the paper. Slowly I opened my
fist and placed the paper along with my past failures
into His loving hand. The exchange was immediate and my
burden was replaced with peace. I could now enter into
His rest. There would be no need to labor to steer clear
of wrong situations or dangerous places. I was free to
merely follow and learn from Jesus.
Is it really that simple? Yes, it is.
In John 14:27, Jesus said, "Peace I leave with you,
My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give
to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it
be afraid."
{End Paige quotes}
With both this traumatic experience and Paige’s Word, I
really prayed over issues of my past. The first thing
the Lord brought up was the fact that I had kept a
little file on my computer of all the “bad” lessons I
had learned that I never wanted to repeat again! I felt
I needed to keep it there as a reminder. The Lord
“reminded” me that His love keeps no record or inventory
of worthless, bad, evil, harm.
1 Corinthians 13:5 NKJV
Does not behave itself rudely, seeks not her own, is
not easily provoked, keeps no record of evil. {2556}
1Co 13:5 NLT
It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable,
and it keeps no record of being wronged.
Strong's Greek Dictionary
2556. kakos
A primary word; worthless (intrinsically, such; whereas
4190 properly refers to effects), i.e. (subjectively)
depraved, or (objectively) injurious:—bad,
evil, harm, ill, noisome, wicked.
Check mark:
Deleted file.
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2. LET GO OF BUSTED DREAMS
 The
next thing the Lord reminded me of was a BD card I sent
a few years ago where a bear was riding along on some
balloons, and one by one they popped and he was getting
lower and lower until he finally fell to the ground.
Finally a hot air balloon comes and he climbs in and
soars up, up, up! It was kind of a consolation card
because this person had made several errors in following
his dreams and had really lost a lot due to these
errors. It was the Lord’s Word saying that this person
was being given another chance for promotion after
learning difficult lessons.
Check mark:
Let go of the busted dreams of the past!
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3. CUT THE APRON STRINGS
Next the Lord reminded me of a poem the Lord gave me
about cutting apron strings in order to allow our
children (and family) to climb higher in the Lord. We
must release them to go on with God, and follow the
pathway He has prescribed and not try to create them
into our own image! Our dreams for them may not be
God’s dreams, and even if we know His dreams, He may
want to fulfill them differently than we expect. We
must let go and relinquish control.
POEM: STRINGS 10/13/05
I see a balloon high in the sky
Having traveled miles gone by.
I once held on and grasped it tight
Against tug and pull to take flight.
The wrestling of strings are now released.
In surrender there is always peace.
Remember well to give back to God.
And all of heaven will applaud.
It hurts a mother to cut her strings.
But such delight when she sees their wings.
Flying on prayers so lovingly given,
They’ll find their way for which they’ve striven.
Now they soar and fly in the wind.
Where they go, we see no end.
Roots and wings we give our kids.
To seek God’s best, not what’s forbid.
Always take time to say a prayer.
The wind will carry your heart that’s there.
A mother’s prayers will never cease.
On through history past deceased.
1 Sam 1:22-8 NKJV
But Hannah did not go up, for she said to her
husband, "Not until the child is weaned; then I will
take him, that he may appear before the LORD and remain
there forever." So Elkanah her husband said to her,
"Do what seems best to you; wait until you have weaned
him. Only let the LORD establish His word." Then the
woman stayed and nursed her son until she had weaned
him. Now when she had weaned him, she took him up with
her, with three bulls, one ephah of flour, and a skin of
wine, and brought him to the house of the LORD in
Shiloh. And the child was young. Then they slaughtered a
bull, and brought the child to Eli. And she said, "O my
lord! As your soul lives, my lord, I am the woman who
stood by you here, praying to the LORD. For this child I
prayed, and the LORD has granted me my petition which I
asked of Him. Therefore I also have lent him to the
LORD; as long as he lives he shall be lent to the LORD."
So they worshiped the LORD there.
CHECK MARK: Chop all control and apron
strings with loved ones.
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4. CUT EMOTIONAL SOUL TIES WITH UNEQUALLY YOKED
FELLOWSHIP
As I was still praying over this balloon trauma, I was
also wrestling over a demonic door of a person I had
been praying over. The Lord reminded me that we need to
be careful about the people we minister to, that their
issues do not affect our own peace and level of
fellowship in the Lord. Sometimes this comes through
unequally yoked fellowship and soul ties. Sometimes it
is a matter of priorities and where the Lord wants us to
spend our time. Sometimes it is nothing more than
distraction over people’s issues, which was true in my
case.
The Lord reminded me that His friends and family were
ONLY those who did the will of His Father. That is a
good indicator of Whom He considers equally yoked
fellowship.
Matthew 12:46-50 While he yet talked to the people,
behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside,
desiring to speak with him. 47 Then one said unto him,
Behold, your mother and your brothers stand outside,
desiring to speak with you. 48 But he answered and said
unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my
brothers? 49 And he stretched forth his hand toward his
disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brothers!
50 For whosoever shall do the will of my Father who is
in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and
mother.
CHECK MARK: Keep people’s issues from
spiritually & emotionally hindering and distracting my
relationship with God. Cut emotional ties with all
levels of distraction.
As I pondered this and making sure my soul ties were
clean, Pastor James sent the following Word!
PASTOR JAMES 4/18/13 SOUL TIES
www.highercallingministriesintl.com
I experienced something very different this morning. The
presence of the Lord was very strong and I received a
vision of Him watching over us from Heaven. I went face
down and felt the Spirit lifting me up. However this
time I was moving up backwards. It felt like the Spirit
was lifting me by my waist and I was looking back at the
milestones we were passing. I tried to look forward but
was not able to change my position. I seemed to be
traveling through some kind of spiritual tunnel and I
could see bright rings around the tunnel at regular
intervals, and felt that we were moving very fast as
ring after ring passed by and disappeared in the
distance. When the Spirit finally lifted me into Heaven,
I was pulled into the cloud of His glory. The cloud was
moving constantly and the colors kept changing as I
experienced different parts of the Shekinah cloud. As I
was soaking in the Presence it was wonderful, but I also
was shown many images and faces in rapid succession. I
didn’t really understand what was happening. So, I asked
for wisdom and revelation to understand what these
things meant. The Lord said, “It
is time to relinquish control over the direction of your
life, and let the Spirit lead you! Let Him take you
where you are being sent!”
Then the Lord said, “If you want to receive the things
you are requesting, you
must let go of some things in your life! The things you
were shown and the faces you saw are things from which
you need to be set free! Let go of soul ties with
the people you saw! Get rid of the things you were
shown!” The fire was placed in our hands to empower us
to do what the Lord was commanding today. Some of the
things and faces were not familiar to me. I understood
by the Spirit that these are things and people from
which some of you need to be set free. I was even shown
some people I need to remove from my Facebook list of
friends. In fact, I had to do that for one person before
I could finish this message. Then the Lord told me to
delete all the email messages and contact information
for this person. I paused at this point and did what the
Lord told me to do.
The Lord once again took me through a teaching about the
time of the “falling away.” I was told that more and
more people will stop associating with us as we allow
the Spirit to lead us. In addition to those who separate
from us, there are others
we need to let go and
break off all soul ties. These people are hindering our
walk with the Lord. It is time to cancel every legal
assignment we have given to the enemy through these soul
ties and to be set free from everything which hinders
our walk with Him. The Lord was not asking us
to cut off a lot of people. We are only to separate from
those specifically named by Him. We will still be
connected with those we are called to minister to and
those we are to lead to the Lord. Don’t begin to cut
people off unless you hear it clearly from the Lord.
I pray that we will have very clear spiritual
discernment in these matters! I pray for you to hear
clearly from the Lord so that what you do will be in
obedience to Him! It is not a time to bring more strife
into your life. It is time to be set free from it so you
can obediently follow the leadership of the Lord. This
requires great discernment. I pray that you will be
elevated in your gift of discerning in the spiritual
realm. Amen and Amen!!!
Pastor James Durham
Higher Calling Ministries, Intl
5. THE PARABLE OF HOLDING THE STRING OF THE KITE
Once as I pondered the trauma of the balloon day, the
Lord brought into memory the other side of the fence in
regards to letting go of strings. There are times that
it is vitally important that we hold on and don’t let
go. It’s a matter of maturity of the one who is yet a
child in the Lord.
Our youngest grandchild, the one who was so traumatized
about the balloons flying away, had undergone open heart
surgery at the age of 3 weeks. The Lord told me that
when the doctors stopped her heart, He would bring her
to Himself and He would personally be holding her!
“HOLD ME!” My precious granddaughter has already
experienced death and being taken from her body and
flying UP just like those balloons. I sincerely think
there is some connection to her sub-conscience memory of
that day and we are sure praying over this wound.
The Lord told me something when I was doing an inventory
over soul ties after having to fight off the person’s
demons the other day. He said that no matter what this
person chose (in regards to my prayers over a possible
good or bad decision) that I must not get distracted and
I needed to stay with my children and not give up
praying for them.
Immediately He brought back the memory of the
String of the Kite Word He gave me. Our prayers
(and thus our true care and concern) are vital to
helping the children and the next generation to be
launched. These are those who are still not able to fly
without our help and our walks and prayers in the Lord
are vital to them. We must continue to stand in the gap
and hold on, being a foundation for them and a stable
place for them to grow up.
The bottom line is
that a kite will not soar and not fly at all without
someone else on the ground, holding onto its string.
CHECK MARK: Hold tightly in prayer over those
who are needing to fly in God.
WORD TO PONDER: TRAUMA AND FEAR OF LOSS 4/17/13
Dear hearts, I know all your wounds, all your fears, all
your mistakes and all your losses. There is nothing
that has escaped Me. Every detail of every moment of
your lives are recorded in My book. I have prayed for
you and held you through all your painful moments. I
understand the nature of your grasp and want to teach
you the delicate balance between letting go and holding
on.
This is a heart matter where you learn how to let go of
anything and anyone that steals your peace and wellbeing
and trust in Me. Yes beloveds, place every loved one in
My capable hands to loving draw and raise up into their
destinies. Yes beloveds, let go of all hindrances that
keep your focus off fellowship with Me and what I AM
doing in your life. Trade what you are gripping onto,
and the fear of its loss with what I AM holding in
reservation for you. What I have to replace, is so much
better than you realize.
On the other side of the fence, dear ones never stop
praying and believing My very best for all those you
carry in the Spirit who are suffering trauma. Learn the
delicate balance of holding on without grasping. Let My
love flow and My peace reign in your hearts. Give all
your loved ones to Me to raise and I will give you
wisdom on how to partner with Me in the process.
Isaiah 53:4-11 Surely he has borne our griefs, and
carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken,
smitten by God, and afflicted. 5 But he was wounded for
our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities:
the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his
stripes we are healed. 6 All we like sheep have gone
astray; we have turned everyone to his own way; and the
LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all. 7 He was
oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his
mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as
a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he opened not
his mouth. 8 He was taken from prison and from judgment:
and who shall declare his generation? for he was cut off
out of the land of the living: for the transgression of
my people was he stricken. 9 And he made his grave with
the wicked, and with the rich in his death; because he
had done no violence, neither was any deceit in his
mouth. 10 Yet it pleased the LORD to bruise him; he has
put him to grief: when you shall make his soul an
offering for sin, he shall see his offspring, he shall
prolong his days, and the will of the LORD shall prosper
in his hand. 11 He shall see the travail of his soul,
and shall be satisfied: by his knowledge shall my
righteous servant justify many; for he shall bear their
iniquities.
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