TO SPILL THE BEANS

Blessings When Sharing Our Testimony

1/24/03

Hi Loved Ones,

I once had a dream when I saw a beloved man of God dancing in heaven. I heard the Lord say he had been a martyr. That shocked me because I knew this man had died of cancer. I did not understand until the Lord clarified that the enemy had placed cancer upon him because he was a Christian! That sure opened my eyes to a new way of thinking.

We are persecuted when the demonic world pursues us as well as when we are accused, judged, cursed and misrepresented by man. And often we do not realize that when we are facing persecution by men, it is actually the demons manifesting in response to the anointing of Christ Jesus and the Holy Spirit. More often than not, when a Christian loses his job, loses his health, or when he loses anything, it is caused by persecution. Whether we see it with our natural eyes or not, we have an enemy of our soul that hates the One we love. And that enemy is an arch opponent to Jesus Christ. By our very name, CHRISTian, we have the promise of being persecuted for righteousness sake.

Some of the meanings of the word persecute (dioko {dee-o'-ko}) is to pursue and follow after. If you can picture the long story of Saul chasing David, that is persecution. It is an interesting fact that this word has its roots in the following words: fearful, timid servant of the Lord! So, I draw the conclusion that the root or motive of persecution is to cause fearful and timid servants. Interesting. We all know the opposite of fear is faith. Since we are being persecuted, we need to know our promises and stand upon them.

JESUS PROMISED THAT WE ARE BLESSED AND REWARDED

"Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. "Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you." (Matt 5:10-12 NKJV)

That word reward, (misthos {mis-thos'}) means to be paid for services, thus it is our wages for "standing" against persecution.

DAVID HOPED FOR BLESSINGS TO REPLACE THE CURSES

"If the LORD has told him to curse me, who am I to stop him?" Then David said to Abishai and the other officers, "My own son is trying to kill me. Shouldn't this relative of Saul have even more reason to do so? Leave him alone and let him curse, for the LORD has told him to do it. And perhaps the LORD will see that I am being wronged and will bless me because of these curses." So David and his men continued on, and Shimei kept pace with them on a nearby hillside, cursing as he went and throwing stones at David and tossing dust into the air." (2 Sam 16:10-13 NLT)

GOD TURNED THE CURSES AGAINST ISRAEL INTO A BLESSING

"Nevertheless the LORD your God would not listen to Balaam, but the LORD your God turned the curse into a blessing for you, because the LORD your God loves you." (Deut 23:5-6 NKJV)

PARABLE OF BLESSING OUR ENEMIES

Recently I was walking down the street and silently, in my thoughts praying blessings upon those who persecute. Through the above scriptural principals, I knew I would be blessed. What a deal!

Anyway, I was so busy praying blessings, that when I passed a particular house, and heard a dog growl behind the fence, I instinctively prayed, "Bless the dog." The dog quietly sat down in that same instant. I was chuckling at this and believing that this really was a supernatural experience, when I walked passed the next house. I already knew the reputation of that loud dog behind the fence and just as he took a lunge I silently prayed, "And bless this dog too!" I heard the strangest sound from this throat. It was not a growl, it was like he swallowed his bark. I have never heard a sound like that. The bark never came out, it went back in! (How do you describe a sound like that?) He was instantly quiet, he turned around and didn’t peep a sound until I was one block away. Then I heard the 2 dogs snipping at each other behind their fences. I don’t know if those dogs got blessed, but I sure was.

MARTYRS - TO WITNESS WHAT WE HAVE SEEN AND HEARD

Did you know the word martyr in the Greek means witness? {martus {mar'-toos}) I always thought it meant death. So, as a Christian, any time we share or witness to others the relationship we have with Jesus, we are a martyr. Now that’s a thought!

I once had a real fear about "coming out of the closet" with the news of my relationship with Jesus. After I had written the first draft of my first book, "101 Ways God Speaks (And How to Hear Him) I had some stretching times. I shared it with a couple of people, and they popped my bubble really fast. "It reads like an encyclopedia." "Add some spice to it, add your life and how God talks to you!" YIKE. That hit me hard. We were talking about my privacy, which was a sacred word in my vocabulary. "What will people THINK, and most of all my family???"

Well I didn’t like their suggestion at all, and decided I would take some writing classes instead. Maybe I needed something more than anointing, like more education…

SHOW IT - DON’T TELL IT

In the first class, the teacher said the only way you are ever going to get people to read what you have to say is if you "Show it, don’t tell it." Then she explained to us the difference between passive writing and action. The teacher talked about adding action and life into the facts, so they move with a pace. She wanted living stories, not dead ones. Then she explained to us the difference between passive writing and action. Passive writing is like this to me: "I went to the store, walked down the aisle and found what I needed. The store looked like a mess and I went home." And I picture active writing like this: "I stepped into the store and my foot halted abruptly at the door jam. Massive chaos. Boxes everywhere. The place looked like Christmas morning, after the fact. "Is that one item I need worth surviving this obstacle course?" I wasn’t too sure.

I left that class in a daze. "He anointed me to write, I want to write, but He wants me to use examples in my own life?????" "You’ve got to be kidding Lord. Please say You are kidding."

STRRRRRRRRREEEETCH

For the next several years (yes years) I had stretching lessons. For people like me, I made Moses’ conversation at the burning bush seem pretty dull. After all, Moses only made a few excuses.

When the Lord calls us and anoints us, it isn’t a sudden flash of perfection and whamo, we are this super dude who has it all together and ready or not, "Here we come world!" Rather, it is a journey, where He speaks into our lives one step at a time. He knows His own Word about us, He knows us, and He carefully nurtures us through the process until we finally are FREELY walking in the calling He designed.

Somehow my candle managed to stretch up around the bushel once in a while and I could stay there for a few moments with peace in my heart and no fear or reluctance. A step at a time I was managing to re-write the book, this time with my personal life added. But this is how it went: "Trance visions? You want me to tell the world, let alone my family (!) that I have had trance visions? WHAT are they going to THINK?????" We had a lot of conversations like that but mostly it was all one sided conversations. Saying nothing, He was winning the contest while I wrestled inside my own shell.

REPUTATIONS

I finally yielded my wrestlings to Him and chose to rest in the fact that God alone holds the reputations of men in His hands. To some He has chosen honor, to some dishonor. To some He gives to misunderstanding and accusation for a season, to some He favors and promotes. For us to try and protect ourselves is a futile effort. The best we can and should do, is live holy and righteous lives for Him and Him alone and share when and what He prompts us to share. Then we can safely trust that He brings us exactly what we need and always filtered through His love.

While I was still wrestling and stretching inside my shell, all the while I was growing in the Lord and having inklings of knowledge of what was waiting for me on the outside. TRANSPARENCY. "Oh no! Somehow that word is worse than privacy, I think I will stay in here a while longer!" "Transparent? You want me to be transparent? Please say You’re kidding."

BREAKTHROUGH VISION

I had a vision where I was inside this big egg. It got to be pretty confining and so I took my pink baby bottle and started cracking away at the shell from the inside. When I finally got out, I was about 4 years old and dressed in a darling little, puffy pink, party dress. As I climbed out I saw that I was surrounded by all these other eggs. As I looked at them, I knew it was not their time yet. But, I was so excited that I finally got out of my shell, I started to run saying, "I’m going to go tell my Heavenly Father what I just did!"

And that is the beauty of growing in the Lord and coming out of our shells. We each have callings, a purpose, and we each have something to share with others that will make a difference in their lives. The Lord wants us to walk in freedom from the inside out and not be reluctant and fearful givers, afraid of persecution. So He anoints us, draws us to stretch past our own abilities and then lets us war through our own insecurities.

If the mother bird pecks at the shell of her children, helping them break out, then the baby bird has not developed the muscles it takes to survive on the outside world. The baby in the fullness of time does this by himself. It is God’s way in all of us. By the end of the book, I had waited so long, that my wrestlings had changed to groaning about the confinement. I wanted out, released and sent. He certainly knows how to change our tune!

During that time, He gave me one of His "dark speech" promises that in His perfect timing I would "spill the beans." Little did I know how joyous it would be. I was looking through my journal and came across the following story. I think it is a living parable of many things. For me it was like the first version of my book versus the final one. It is also a parable of our own wrestlings in sharing our lives in the Lord with others. At first we are very "allergic" to the concept and follow the old role models of boring religion, but finally as a real relationship with the Lord wins out, we begin to share our real stories of how we know of Him in our personal lives.

HERE IS THE BEAN BAG STORY…

Somewhere I got the idea we all needed beanbags. We found some on sale at WalMart. So, we bought one to try it out, and it smelled really bad... like paint thinner. The beads were made out of some material that had a strong inhalant in them but we decided it would fade in time. As I tried it out at home, I was coughing that night, but decided it would be OK, so we went back and bought 2 more. Then we decided that the bags were stuffed too full. That was a mistake. Since the zippers wouldn't open, I ripped a hole in the seams to let some of the beans out. The beans were not beans at all but shredded flakes. And they had static electricity in them, so they CLUNG. What a mess.

Somehow, we managed to pour some of them out of the bags, and repair the holes. That night I was coughing so bad I thought my lungs were going to fall out. I had the paint thinner like dust in my lungs from all the pouring, and I was miserable. When Wayne finally put the bag in the other room, I stopped coughing. So we had spent $60 on bean bags we couldn’t use, and had the smell in all the bedrooms, down stairs and in our car. Boy was that a cleanup. And I still had no bean bags.

In spite of all the hassle, I didn’t give up and decided to make them myself. After I made the sacks with some nice soft material, I found some non smelling, and real styrofoam beans at Freddies. It was time to pour them into the sacks and Wayne was in the other room. Insert brainy idea. I made the wonderful decision to pour them all by myself.

The first try, the bag slipped, and I had the equivalent of 2 large king size pillows of beans all over the floor. I just stood there and gawked. After all the hassle with the last bean bags, I was undone. The pressure mounted inside and it was either laugh or cry. All I could think of was "I love Lucy." I started to giggle at such a huge pile all over and bent down to scoop. The beans had static electricity in them, and they traveled up my arms, in my hair, all over the table, all over the floor and I started to hysterically laugh and laugh. I laughed so hard I cried and there I was in the midst of this huge pile laughing and laughing all by myself. As I was both laughing and crying, suddenly I heard the Lord say, "Spilled the beans!!!" That was my undoing. I was laughing so hard I just couldn't get them back in the bag. So I left them scattered all over and went into the other room to cool down.

A couple of hours later my son came home from school and I could hear him in the other room, yelling, "AAAAHHHHHHHHHHKKKKKKKK!!! I'M NOT CLEANING UP THIS ONE!!!" By the end of the night I managed to clean up most of them without using the vacuum and wasting several cases of bags.

One week later I found beans in the hall, in the laundry, in the washer, in all the bedrooms, in my bathroom, in the living room, and in the kitchen. How they traveled there is a mystery. Each time I found one, it was like finding a treasure and I’d laugh all over again. Well that is my bean bag story and I’m "sticking" to it. I think the Lord is very funny. I think it is a parable of coming out of the closet with publishing the book and the website and the seeds are scattering everywhere!!! {end of journal entry}

SUMMARY

So beloved in the Lord, fear not when your beans are spilled and your testimony goes before mankind. Know that every seed that scatters has a marvelous blessing attached and even if you are persecuted, you have blessings and rewards coming. It’s a promise!

"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." (Rom 8:28-29 NKJV)

"God blesses you when you are mocked and persecuted and lied about because you are my followers." NLT Matthew 5:11

I will close with the Word to Ponder written from that particular day’s rhema.

Lovingly,

Sandy

WORD TO PONDER - MY PILE OF WORD TREASURES

You think that you are going nowhere fast in walking through your daily life, and wondering if My promises will ever come to pass. But I tell you My child, that every day I am building My Word within you. You are growing a step at a time and one day you will be so stuffed, you will be completely full and spilling over. In that day, you shall have My Word, Word, Word and it shall spill, spill, spill, and I shall scatter it as seed everywhere. There shall be so many seeds in the wind, that you will not be able to track them or retrieve them as they shall spill out upon the earth in one wonderful pile. So you may think weary thoughts right now, but I promise you that one day you shall laugh with joy and delight as you romp in the pile. And your heart will twinkle as I give them back to you, placing them in your daily life one by one. They shall be like hidden treasures when suddenly I shall open your eyes and you shall hear My voice speak back to you. My Word lives on and on and on and I love to feed My loved ones liberally.

"I rejoice at Your word as one who finds great treasure." (Ps 119:162 NKJV)